Arcaida: Survivors of the Serpent

Maturity: There is a bit of violence and if you're a Christian, like me, there will be some unbiblical stuff. As far as romance goes, nothing in it. Not even a kiss or a mention of romance. Fantasy: Completely, but I suppose it is categorized as after the end of the world.


How are you my son?" said the elder of the village, as he stared at me with all knowing eyes. I was about 10 at the time and so I didn't say much. "I want to hear the story..." Were all the words I could scramble out. She laughed deeply and her voice was warm and calming. "Okay then, gather around children" She said, beginning the tale of a life time. She started with telling us of how our kind came to this planet; the planet we call Arcadia. "Long ago our race lived on a planet known as earth. After many years we destroyed it in one finale battle against ourselves. Only the space colonies survived. Among them was a great scientist who had a grand idea. He had invented a planet making device. This device was named EER, it stood for Earth's Ending Resort. In our finale stand to keep our race alive, he used EER. It created a world much like earth, but with a bit less water and a lot more jungles and no islands. However, something was wrong. The animals and plants had life, but it soon began to fade for man could not create souls into their work. Man seemed to have no God these days, none believed in anything but, science. And so, they had nothing. Life on the planet was dying and the people were sad, the food would not satisfy and the animals were not friends.

Just then, the humans looked to the sky and saw a great being. This creature was snake like and they described it as a creature made of all animals and plants. The humans had nothing left, so without knowing the creature, they got on their knees and begged. The creature turned it's head and seemed mother like for a moment. She smiled at them for a moment, then she spoke. "In my body, there are many spirits. Spirits of all creatures, mostly from the ones that you have killed.... However, I love life and so I will grant you your wish, but he warned oh humans! There is always a price." The humans nodded and the great snake flapped her mighty wings. On the earth, spread out millions of spirits. Many claimed bodies, but some descended high onto the top of the tallest mountain, far too tall for man to reach. Then the great snake started to fly near to the new planet. She then vanished into it's core and from the sea; grew a large forest. The humans were very happy after this and for three hundred years, they multiplied. The new earth was named Arcadia and life grew all around it. However, man soon found places of their own and tribes began to war with others. The snake saw this and rose high in the sky around them. She shook her head and some say that a tear rolled down her face. "I gave you the blessings of my spirits and you still take them, so now I will demand my price. Take three of your strongest women and three of your kindest men. Bring them into the forbidden forest and when they come out, do not be alarmed. The tribes did what she said, knowing that they had too. Six humans from each tribe went in and when they came out, they had great powers. The tribes looked on this and were frightened. The snake then saw these humans that had powers and shook her head. "To these humans I curse their bodies with a few of my powers. To each of these I give two powers. You will destroy the earth by your powers and that is what i give to these creatures." She said, slithering off into the core of the earth. The humans looked at each other confused, but they soon realized what she meant. The humans with powers soon became corrupt and started ruling over the other tribes and making a tribe of their own.

One woman saw this and knew that it had to stop, she had been giving powers as well, but she did not use them like this. She ran deep into the forbidden forest and saw the snake there. " Dear mother, I see this curse and ask that you put an end to it. Please!" She begged. The snake shook her head sadly. "My creature has asked for this great world and so she shall get it." the snake said, turning her head. Suddenly the snake put her tail on the woman's shoulder. "However, because of your braveness, I give unto you and your family a great gift. Every coming of age for your followers, you will climb the mountain of spirits and you will be given a necklace. This necklace will show you what animal trait you must live by and you will gain powers. Your power will be great, as you find yourself becoming more like the animal." The woman was greatly excited and she ran off to the mountain. She took her tribe and when they came of age, she granted them the powers bestowed on her. And that was the start of the middle village living in peace." The elder finished, her voice was crackling a bit. I smiled and then looked out the window at the great village. We lived in peace, for now.


Current Time-! There are three main villages the village of the royals is called Demonice (Dim-On-iss) and it is set far away from the others. It lies in the middle of the savannah. The plains that are currently unnamed. This is the village where those cursed with uncontrollable gifts lie. The second village is the village of war and it is known as Realianta(Real-E-inta) and it rests deep within a jungle set off from the main land by one very long strip of land. This is where the humans are, they are the wisest of the three in the way of technology and clothes. They spend their time designing weapons, they are much like a small New York in the middle of Africa. It is very noticeable and set out. The third is known as the village of peace. This village is called Serpenta(Ser-pent-ah) it is named after their mother. This village is the biggest and lies at the bottom and throughout the mountain of the spirits. This village is home to people called Animal Followers. They have powers that grow stronger when they act like the animal trait they are given.


This is the description of what the spirits are like on the great mountain.





Spirits of the Mountain- There is a great story in our village. A story of a human who wanted so badly to become gifted or even cursed, that he would give up the very thing that made him human. It says that long ago there was a man. This man wanted to become like the people of peace; the people who were gifted by their animal trait. So; his journey took him high into the mountains. This journey was long, for the mountain was never meant to be climbed by mere humans. After three years of climbing, he finally gave up. He knew that he would never make it to the top..... Suddenly, when all hope seemed to be lost, he saw a mighty hawk like creature flying through the sky. He then got an amazing idea and he called to the gifted. "Oh great bird of this mountain, because your wings are so large and you can surly take me to the top; I ask this of you. I ask that you take me to where the great spirits touch Arcadia. And if you do, I will give you my soul and serve you as your slave.". The man looked at him, a bit puzzled. The gifted then swooped down with his mighty wings and landed in front of the man. He needed a human with their thumbs to kill the others who opposed him and he could rule the skies. He agreed to do what the man had said, and so he took him to the very top of the mountain. Once there, the human grinned. They hovered over the top, but as soon as they were about to land, the human pulled his knife. The human then pressed it gently into the gifted's back. The gifted felt a sharp pain, and then his wings failed him and his world went blank. The human and the gifted where sent hurling to the ground. The human hit the ground and got up fast. He turned to the body and suddenly he felt a bit of guilt for what he had done, but he needed the powers. Suddenly! A lightning bolt struck the ground. The human was sent flying back, but he did not get hurt. The light stayed there and the man wondered why. He walked over to it and just as he was about to touch it, the sky burst open. Everything seemed as though night had fallen upon it. Then, great spirits burst from what seemed to be a break in the sky. An ocean of light blue and green washed over him, but he could still breath. He watched as whales flew at him, but did not harm him. He saw mighty lions rushing around him and deer running beside them. His eyes flashed about, watching as the spirits danced all around the scene. He saw many animals, too many to name. He then felt all emotions rush over him. They were of sadness and grief and then happiness and excitement. His mind was slowly washed away by these things. Then, a great lion touched the mountain and stood before him. The lion then changed into a women and she looked much like the human. The man looked up and saw her and knew that this was his mother. He was puzzled by this, but he dared not speak. The woman then looked over at the gifted, lying on the ground. The ocean seemed to center around him for a moment and a great hawk came to his side. The gifted was lifted into the sky and suddenly the wolf and the gifted became one. The wolf then departed into the sky. The human kept his mouth open, but he could not speak. The women then changed into a lion and spoke. Her words were joined by others and you could not count the great voices that he heard. "You have taken his life, your brother. Because we are all the same, you have in return killed a part of you. We spirits were born of mother, and we are a part of mother as you are to this world and to us. Because you have been selfish in learning this, you must be shown by another means." The spirits said. The human then looked at the ground and before him stood a necklace. The necklace was made of stone and it was in the shape of a whale. "To become a man of the world, you must let patience guide you." The spirits said. Then, the ocean of light and the spirits were gone. The man picked up the necklace and was too afraid to stay any longer.

Great job! :1 The plot is intriguing. My only criticism would be to watch the punctuation. (Oh, and you do need to include the maturity and fantasy in the top of your post as well as in the description. I'd recommend, for the one within your post, to describe what makes the story mature or fantastical rather than simply stating the level of it. )

Okay, thanks.