The Sown Shadow - Bringing you yesterday's news today!

by **shadowsowner888** 8/21/2009, 9:02 am

It’s just as I always knew it would be - too quiet.

I would lie in my room at night, falling asleep. On those nights when the fan wasn’t turned on, there was still a pleasant buzzing sound, one that kept me company. The buzzing of the frog tank’s filter.

At first it annoyed me, and I was constantly doing what I could to make the noise more silent. But as the months went on, I grew to smile at the sound. I liked having a little noise, and it was like a lullaby to me - and soon I was so accustomed to it that I didn’t even notice it at all.

Starfire was a great frog. I’d had her for six years. She was easy to take care of; all I had to do was make sure I fed her. I admit I neglected her once in a while, but she did get fed, and she was safe.

Now . . . she’s gone. Sad

I could probably even blame it on myself. I found her body between that of the filter base and the tank wall . . . I don’t know how it happened, but she’s been long dead. I can just picture it, though. My computer’s right above where the tank was, so it’s easy for me to accidentally hit it with my knee. I bet I did that, and it knocked the base into her while she was down there . . . Sad

She would’ve been kicking at first, struggling to get free. Not giving up . . . until she knew that she would never escape. Crying or Very sad

She was my thirteenth frog. But she was luckier than the rest - none of the others ever lasted more than a month or two. Starfire lasted six years. But now I’m done. I don’t think I want any more frogs. And now, when I turn the computer off, my ears will be ringing . . . longing for the sound of Starfire’s tank filter.

*sigh* It’s always worse when you have so long to be attached to them.

She’s the pet I had for the longest. Sad

I loved my little froggy. I’m sorry, Starry. I shoulda paid more attention to you. I’m sorry Danny, and Beastboy and Cyborg and Robin and Raven, the three of you who never even made it into the tank, Hopkins and Spot, and Hopkins and Spot the second. I’m sorry Reeces and Terra - you two were great little bunnies. But you died of old age, Reeces . . . my special bunny with the same birthday as me, and the pedigree to prove it . . . and I neglected you, Terra, my replacement bunny who I never deserved. Sad

I’m sorry I didn’t take enough care of you for you or your baby to live. I’m sorry, all you garter snakes who I abused just by trying to keep captive. I’m sorry toads, for doing the same thing to you. I’m sorry Anikan. You were a cool little salamander . . . I’m sorry I didn’t make sure Gri filled your water. I’m sorry Ophelia that you couldn’t live once you became a mom. I’m sorry that your babies never hatched. They woulda been cute little praying mantises. I’m sorry Riley for trying to condemn you to Ophelia’s fate, and I’m sorry Katy for letting you drown. You were the best little Katydid.

I’m sorry Shadow. I should’ve calmed you down, kept you from running outside somehow. I shouldn’t have let you run outside. Sad

I’m sorry you all. I loved you all so much, and you just weren’t meant to live.

Now all I have is Angel. Please, Lord, tell me she’s not condemned to the same fate as the rest of them. Don’t let her die this young. Spare me the pain of losing anyone else.

Spare me the pain of losing my friends here on Twig. If we lose our internet, I lose my life. It was horrible with Neopets, but at least we still had internet . . .

This would be worse.

Help our family please. Don’t make us have to turn off the internet. Bring us money. Help me to finish Dragon Soul and get it published, and help the story to become as popular as Twilight or Harry Potter. We need the money, and you know it. Sad

Seven Sorrows in My Life.
1. Losing everyone. All my pets. Everyone but Angel.
2. Giving up Sugar. You didn’t deserve it. Sad

I’m so sorry we had to take you back to your foster home. You should’ve stayed with us. You needed us.
3. Quitting Neopets. That was the most depressing time of my life. I was addicted, obviously.
4. My parents. But we all know about them already.
5. My friends moving away. I had a three friends in the neighborhood that all moved. Sad

Sure I still talk to one of them, and sure the other two were pretty sick for little kids, but I was a little kid too. That’s devastating.
6. Not being loved. The romance love. Sad

I feel so jealous of all those married people. I need someone real.
7. Being diabetic. In general I’m honored, just because Nick and I are both Type 1 Diabetics. But seriously . . . it saps our money and my time, and I’m going to probably die when I’m sixty because of it. Sad

It’s the worst thing in my life . . . and I’ve had to deal with it for so long that I don’t even care any more. That’s just messed up.

Well, gah. xP Now I’m remembering how Arianna’s making me keep my positive perspective. So here’s a crappy picture of Pootnic!
The Sown Shadow - Bringing you yesterday's news today! 6puexh

The Sown Shadow - Bringing you yesterday's news today! 6puexh

And here’s the playlist. Sorry guys. I couldn’t help but have this be depressing too.

Thanks for suffering through this! Sad

And please do comment. I need happiness right now, and you guys are the main happiness in my life right now.

Note - I wrote this yesterday. xD So I'm not messed up anymore. But I don't feel like editing, so yah.

by **PugsRock** 8/21/2009, 9:05 am

I'm sorry, again. I've never had to go through losing a pet (except fish, but you know. xD), but I still know how badly it hurts. We're here for you, though and we'll help you get through it. So if you need someone to talk to... hi. xD

by **Akeria** 8/21/2009, 9:08 am

You'll get through this, Shadow. I know you will. You're a strong girl, and having obstacles like diabetes has only made you stronger, it seems. Nothing can tear you down unless you let it. Stay strong.

by **Arianna** 8/21/2009, 9:16 am

Aww, I'm so sorry Shadow Sad

I'm so sorry about all of your pets, and about the current situation. Don't worry, it'll just work out, and like Akeria said, it's made you stronger, and that's what it will continue to do. And I know about how losing pets are hard - I've lost many too. I wish I could do something - but as we know, I don't have 30,000 dollars to spare. But don't worry, you'll be fine.
Ah no, and now I've gone all sad too. Oh well, it doesn't hurt to be sad once in a while Sad

Well it does, but you get the point... xD

by **shadowsowner888** 8/21/2009, 9:32 am

Hi Pugs! xD Lawl. Thanks.

Smile

Thanks Keri. You always make me feel so confident! xD I think you have a talent for that.

Thanks Arianna. Smile

At least it's not like I lost Angel - that would kill me. xP

by **Arianna** 8/21/2009, 9:40 am

Well, on a happier note, all of your miis are cool, though some are a bit weird. xD Very Happy

by **shadowsowner888** 8/21/2009, 10:00 am

Thanks!! xD Have you read The Adventures of Hero and Pootnic? If so, see the one below Pootnic up there? That's Monkey.

by **Jinx** 8/21/2009, 10:05 am

That doesn't look the Pootnic I always pictured.

by **Arianna** 8/21/2009, 10:06 am

Nope, I haven't really. I read a bit but then got distracted, but it's still really good Very Happy

by **shadowsowner888** 8/21/2009, 10:11 am

Well, that's him! xD Actually, that's version two. The original version was a Lego Indiana Jones The Video Game dude. But I don't have that pic.

Very Happy

Haha, thanks.

by **Arianna** 8/21/2009, 10:13 am

Cool

And welcome Wink

by **Komoda** 8/21/2009, 5:11 pm

I listen to My Immortal when I'm sad. My best friend and I got in a fight over it and I cried my eyes out while listening to it.

Aw, I'm so sorry all of these things have happened to you, Ado. I know how you feel in a way for number 5... Because,
In grade 3, I had this friend. She was the kind of best friend that you would rely on and you'd never hang out with anyone else...
Then she moved.
I had a similar friend like that in grade 4...
Yeah, she moved too.
Same thing happened in grade 5.
In grade six, seven and eight... I've had friends. But I'm just not as close with them. I can't tell them everything... Mallory's pretty much all I have left, but we have a love-hate relationship. We've done horrible things to each other, and we fight all of the time. But other than her, I'm alone. I have Charly, Alex, Matt, Hannah, Hayley, Binky, Marnie...
But all of them have other closer friends. Mallory has closer friends than me, even though she claims that I'm her best friend. That's why I'm always home, because I have no one to hang out with. I'm a loner.

But losing animals really is hard on you too. I know how you feel about that too, because my cats always die. We have a disease in my barn, so I have to put up with getting attached to kittens then seeing them die in a few months. We're lucky if one kitten out of the five or six batches we have survives another year.

So I guess we have something in common, kinda. Sad

I'm so sorry that your life's tough right now, but hopefully things will get better. You are still young, after all. You have lots of happier years ahead.

Besides, teenagers are always moody and angsty. Let's face it, it can't be avoided. XP