Helpful Advice for Your Daily Life

1. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.

2. You can get anywhere in ten minutes if you drive fast enough.

3. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

4. Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.

5. Into every life, some rain must fall; usually when your car windows are down.

6. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

7. Computers will never replace books. You can't stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf.

8. Calling someone a hobnocker is gross and illegal.

9. Referring to #8, dont ask what a hobnocker is....

10. I dont care what the nerds tell you, pocket protecters are NOT cool!

11. If you see orange squirrels all around you, congrats, you're crazy.

12. Dont upset Chuck Norris, he'll show up...

13. To be sure to hit, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

14. Error: Press any key except... no, No, NO NOT THAT ONE!

15. Friends come and go. Pizza will be there forever.

16. Contrary to popular belief, a barrel full of monkeys isn't fun at all, and is in fact quite horrifying.

17. If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.

18. For every complex problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat and wrong.

19. If you are ever leaving school and a large black vehicle starts following you....GO BACK TO THE SCHOOL!!!!!

20. If you are ever in your backyard and a creepy guy comes.....GO INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!!! (btw, the house that i got this situation from, i'd definately run there. =) )

21. If you don't know who Leonardo DiCaprio is, ya better look him up before someone finds out. Theyre never gonna let you live it down.

22. Never say "yes you are" randomly after someone says something you didnt hear. Once a guy did that after i said, "its so hot"....he said he didnt even hear what i said....

Just to let everyone know, my friend and I made this list together. #20 was one of her additions so the comment in parenthesis is something she said, not me.

Ha, ha, funny.

We started off with like 2 we found online and made this whole list. XD The 2 we found are mixed in there somewhere....#2 and #5, I think.

And we're still adding more as we think of them.

I don't know who Leonardo DiCaprio is.
XD

Ahhh, don't say that!!! He's going to haunt you now!!!! (that seriously happened to me, I'm still being haunted....)

. . .

Confused?

Haha, this is funny!!! XD

Thank you!

SaddleClub wrote:Confused?

Not really.

Okay. But I was serious about Leonardo DiCaprio haunting me.

How so?

Once I was talking with my friend and she said something about him and I didn't know who he was so I said, "Who's that?" Then she started freaking out and saying, "You don't know who Leonardo DiCaprio is?!" and stuff. She told like half the grade and then they were all telling me to watch Titanic. Then he started showing up everywhere -- he was mentioned in a book I was reading, he was brought up on a show I watched, there was even a figure of him at a wax museum my mom took me and my brother to. So I finally watched Titanic and thought he would stop haunting me. But a week later, there was an article about him on my internet's homepage. And my literature teacher brought Titanic up in class. And there was an article about him in a magazine I bought. He's haunting me.....

Oh! OMG! That's who that guy is! XD

Weird.

Yep. That's Leonardo DiCaprio. And he's haunting me. I wish he would just get out of my life already.

Want to make that a prayer request?

What's that?

Never mind.

Hahahahahahahahaha!!! xD
great tips, Saddle!

she'll say Swelcome, just you wait.

LOL thanks for the advice. xD

Haha, swelcome!! XD