Saddle's Blog for 8/31/09

Ok, I'm mad. Second time typing this blog cuz of freakin internet problems.

So today's the last day of August. 9 days till school starts. How cheerful.

There's a movie on tonight I wanna watch. But I probably can't watch it. Luckily, I have a totally awesome, amazing, wonderful, kind friend who's recording it on her TV and she's gonna invite me over another day and we can watch it.

Please help my eggs (and Twiggles). My brown egg and red egg are running out of time, fast. And if they don't hatch, all I'm gonna have is two lovely omlets. So can the few peoples who read my blog pwease continue all your amazing help? Thank you.


I gotta finish my summer packet. My mom's being really mean and said I can't do anything with my friend till I finish it. I'm probably gonna fail it anyway. I don't remember how to do anything. I'm using a calculator for most of the math, and I even think I screwed up the commas page. And I gotta look up a map on Google or something to find out where Central America countries are. Can't they make it easier for us?? This sucks. I can't go to my friend's house to watch 17 Again with her now. She was gonna invite me over at some point to do that. She even said she'd wait till I can come to watch it. How nice is she?

I still need to get a summer reading book. My mom's taking me to the library tonight. I'm not sure if I'll like it, but it's something to read. I've been deprived of reading material lately. I had to clear out my bookcase entirely.

My room is soooo messy. I got a lot of work to do to clean it. I basically can't have anything in it but furniture. (does furniture have an a in it? I keep thinking I'm spelling it wrong) I'm gonna be painting the walls and getting new stuffs for it so basically it's a room I actually love instead of one I wanna burn down. But it's gonna take forever.

This blog is turning out longer than I expected. Oh well, I still have more to say.

Ok, I know this should probably go on the venting club, but I feel like venting now while I feel angry and have a keyboard under my fingertips. My brother is so cruel. He tortures and torments and hurts me, and I'm sick of it. I know I shouldn't let him have that kind of power over me, but I can't help it. He's just that cruel. He insults me and beats me up for no good reason. And then sometimes he just does random stuff with the intent of annoying me. And it usually works. I hate him. And my parents don't even seem to care! Last night he was being mean and my mom just laughed. They never punish him, ever. I think they love him more than me. They only seem to care about me when I do something that can get me in trouble or they can yell at me for. I get a perfect score on a math test, they couldn't care less. I get a 74, they start screaming and cursing at me, saying that I should go to extra help and stop being lazy and letting my grades slip. I end up crying myself to sleep at night a lot because I feel so unloved and neglected. They seem to put my brother up on a pedastal. (is that spelled right? who cares) They buy him so much stupid wrestling stuff, including pay per view matches that cost at least $40 each, yet they won't get me a laptop which would help me with school. They don't even let me go on the computer when I need to. Last year I had to do research for a project in school, and they let my brother play games on the computer and told him to let him have his turn. I couldn't get on till 11 at night and they started yelling and telling me I should've done it earlier. I HATE IT!!!!!

So if you've made it this far in my blog, congratulations. You've made it through a long, boring, stupid blog. All that's left is the bonus section.

SaddleClub




Bonus section



It's never enough to say I'm sorry
It's never enough to say I care
But I'm caught between
What you're wanting from me
And knowing if I give that to ya, I might just disappear

Nobody wins when everyone's losing

[chorus]
It's like one step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do, you're always mad
And I
I can't change your mind, oh
It's like trying to turn around on a one-way street
I can't give you what you want and it's killing me
And I
I'm starting to see
Maybe we're not meant to be

It's never enough to say I love you
No, it's never enough to say I tried
It's hard to believe
That there's no way out for you and me
It seems to be a story of our life

Nobody wins when everyone's losing

[chorus]

There's still time to turn this around
Should we be building this up instead of tearing it down?
But I keep thinking maybe it's too late

It's like one step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do, you're always mad
And I
Can't change your mind, oh
It's like trying to turn around on a one-way street
I can't give you what you want and it's killing me
And I
I finally see
Baby, we're not meant to be
It's like one step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do, you're always mad
And I'm
Baby, I'm sorry to see
Maybe we're not meant to be

I clicked your eggies!
By the way, you should read Wings by Aprilynne Pyke for your summer reading. It's awesome!

By the way, I'm really sorry about how your brother treats you

Thanks!!
And I think I'll read that for fun. I have to pick a specific book for summer reading.

It's ok. I'll get over it eventually. Either that or he'll end up in the hospital and I'll be grounded for life. But at least he'll know not to mess with me anymore.

I'm sorry for you, Sadd. Sounds like a terrible life, and I would just leave, and never come back, when I get out of the house if I were you.

I still have years to go before that happens....

I just realized my song for today kinda reminds me of me and my parents. No matter what I do, they're always mad at me.

Well, you should jsut drive away, and park somewhere, and think, when you get to drive.

I guess. But that's still a few years away.

Who cares?

You should leave the house, and sit up on a roof, writing what you feel in a diary.

I wish there was a roof I could sit on. I've always wanted a room that has a window where I can open it and climb out on the roof. I'd love that. But I don't have that.

Whatever!

I wish I could just leave my house and go anywhere. But my parents would kill me.

You should save up, buy a laptop without your parents knowing, then pack all the food you can into a backback, with the laptop, and run away.

I wouldn't know where to go. And it would take me forever to save up enough money for a laptop.