Random Twilightness

by **Jesus4Eternity** 11/21/2009, 4:44 pm

I walked into the room. "Amanda." Jasper took my face in his hands. I smiled slightly. He brought me to the center of the room, his eyes sparkling with delight. He wrapped my arms around his neck, and his amrs constricted around my body, pushing me closer to him. His gentle face leaned closer to my plain one, his lips approaching. Gently, he pressed them simply to mine, the ice cold of his lips soothing. He kissed me lightly, gently, but passionatly, with true love.
His hands rose to find themselves in my hair, slowly detangling it. his lips were still on mine, soothing with their coolness. He wrapped his arms around me again and pulled me back into the kiss with more passion than I had ever expierienced.
"Amanda." He whispered my name as our lips detattched and reattached. His hands were on my waist now, adn his lips let go of mine. He took my arms off from around his neck and took one of mine in his. He began to turn me around, until we were in a dance, spinning, turning, and grinning. "I love you." He whispered.

"Jasper?" I walked slowly into my room. "Jasper?" I called again. His cold hands appeared on my shoulders. "Hey baby." He whispered, his lips brushing my cheek, his voice utterly like silk. "Hello." I whispered back, my voice sounding crackly next to his. "Are you okay?" He asked, one finger tracing the side of my face. "I'm fine." I muttered, coughing. "Come here." He gathered me into his arms, still staring into my eyes. I coughed again. "I hate it when humans get sick." He joked, but he pulled me closer anyway. "They are so difficult to heal." His voice was still teasing as I snuggled closer to his cold chest. "Then again, I could blame myself." He murmured as I sneezed. "It's not your fault." I tried to whisper, but my throat hurt to much to do most anything. "Shhh, shhh." Jasper pulled my hair back. "Don't strain yourself. I don't want you sicker." He pulled my head into his shoulder, and I smiled and drifted into sleep.
I woke up to humming. "Did I wake you?" Jasper's smooth voice leaned in. "No." I tried to say, but my throat wasn't working. "Shhh." He muttered. "I'll get Carlisle." He lied my head on a pillow. "I don't need-" I tried to protest, but my voice broke. "Shhh." His lips brushed my forehead lightly, and he smiled. "I'll be right back."
About a minute late, he was back, his face twisted with pain. "Oh, Jasper, what's wrong?" I said in the hoarse whisper that was all I could manage. "Baby, don't worry about me." He leaned close to me, his hair falling in his eyes. "I just don't like seeing you like this." He put a cold hand to my forehead, trying to check for a fever. I shivered at his touch, and his hand immediatly retreated. "No..." I tried to protest, but he didn't listen. "It's my fault anyway, Amanda. I won't get you sicker." I sighed and sniffled. He was stubborn...but so was I. If my throat didn't hurt so much, I would have argued, but he was right. As usual. So, I settled for his hand wrapped around mine and I fell asleep.
She was so peaceful in sleep, her blond hair lying around her head like an angel, her dusty blue eyelids fluttering. There she was, my own personal angel. Beauty was in her face, even in sleep. I lifted her into my amrs, lying her head on my lap. I stroked her forehead, hoping she would get better soon. Her beautiful eyelids disapeared, only to be replaced with her beautiful eyes. "Did I wake you?" I murmured quietly. She shook her head and wrapped her arms around my neck, her head resting on my shoulder. "Hey sweetheart." I whispered, my hand around her torso. "Uhhhhh...." She moaned. I kissed her forehead. "What's wrong baby?" I swept her bangs out of her eyes. "My throat." She whispered, her voice cracking. "I'm so sorry, baby. Come here." I let her bury her head in my chest. I couldn't stand to see her in pain. She was to good for that. "It'll be okay sweetheart. I'm going to make it okay." I rubbed her back as she snuggled into my chest.
Jasper?" Carlisle's voice came into the room. "I need to examine her." Amanda's arms came out from around my neck and looked at Carlisle. "I told you Jasper, I'm fine." Her crackly voice tried to protest. "Baby, I'm sorry. I want to make sure you're okay." I lied her back down on the couch, her head in my hands. I left one hand on her forehead. "Carlisle, I think she has a fever." I muttered. "Move your hand Jasper." I did. "Hmm...um, Jasper, you're going to have to get up." I exchanged my lap for a pillow and stood up, watching Amanda with cautious eyes. Five minutes later, Carlisle slid a thermometer in mer mouth. Fifty-four seconds later, it beeped. "Oh no. I thought it wasn't possible..." Carlisle was muttering. "What?" I asked, me fingers back on her forehead. "It seems that when I...turned Edward, a bit of the Spanish Influenza virus was still in him. It was transfered to Amanda." I gasped. "No. No. No....." I leaned beside her, moving the pillow and letting her head rest in my lap again. "Amanda."
"Jasper?" I looked up at his perfect face. "Hey baby." Now his voice was thick and crackly. "Oh, Jasper, what happened?" I choked out. He helped me sit up, and I slumped on his shoulder. "You...you have the Spanish Influenza." He lookd at me, his eyes deep and depressed. "Oh, Jasper!" I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I'm sorry."
I whispered, my voice about ot break from overuse when I was sick. "Why are you sorry? It's my fault. You did nothing." He muttered. "I'm sorry that I'm causing you pain." I lifted my head slightly, but he lied it back on his shoulder. "It's not your fault, Amanda. It's mine. Edward probably transfered the virus to me somwhow, and I gave it to you by kissing you."
"Oh, Jasper." I wrapped my arms around him again, shivering. For once, he declined. "I'm sorry, sweetheart." He murmured in my ear. "I can't have you sicker." So I settled for falling asleep as he hummed a familar tune, my head in his hands.

Emmett bounded downstairs, a huge grin on his face. "Hey Jazz!" He jumped from the top of the stairs. "Shh!" I covered Amanda's ears as she turned onto her side. "Oh....what's wrong with her?" Emmett came to inspect Amanda. "Spanish Influenza." I muttered, looking down at the beauty I didn't deserve. Amanda didn't deserve a monster like me, one who could kill her at any time. She deserved someone better, someone nicer, someone better looking. She didn't deserve me. But she loved me. Her eyes opened once again. "Emmett!" She grinned, and tried to get up. I kept her down. "Come on Jazz, let her see her brother." Emmett grabbed Amanda from my hold and she laughed. "Ha ha, Jasper." She joked, but she starting sneezing again, so I brought her back to the safety of my arms. She sniffled lightly and leaned into me, her body swaying. "Jasper...I don't feel good." Her face was pale, clammy, covered in a line of sweat. I pulled her closer, but she tried to worm free. I let her go, and she bolted to the bathroom.
"Amanda?" She was leaning over the toilet, her face green. "You don't need to see this Jasper." She coughed out, but I didn't care. I pulled her sweaty hair back from her face and let my cool hand find her forehead. She rinsed her mouth out and I carried her to the couch. Her head was buried in my chest again, my hand on the back of her neck, cooling her down. "You're such a southern gentleman." She mumbled. "Why, thank you, ma'am." I put on my fake country accent that always made her laugh. She let out a weak giggle, but nothing else. And her face turned green again.
"Come on sweetheart." She leaned over the toilet again, and I could hear her suffering. I pulled her hair back again and my fingers lingered on her forehead. After she rinsed her mouth out, and we were back on the couch, I looked straight into her eyes. "Do you need anything?" She shook her head. "I'm going to get you a bottle of water." She nodded slowly. "Okay." Her voice was still weak. I hurried in the kitchen, just in case she might need me again. "Esme?" I called upstairs. She hurried down. "Yes, Jasper?" Her heart-shape face looked at Amanda with compassion. "Carlisle told me. I'm sorry." She smiled sadly, then turned back to me. "Can you put in a movie? I have a feeling Amanda's going to be here a while. I'd do it, but she's burning up." I gave Amanda the bottle and put my hand on her warm forehead. Even in a t-shirt and shirts, she was sweating. I wrapped one arm around her and put the other one her head, slowly, hopefully, cooling her down.
"Of course. Amanda?" She looked at me. "What would you like to watch?" I shrugged. Jasper answered for me. "Put in Lord of the Rings." He rubbed my back. "You like that movie, right?" I nodded. "Okay." He grabbed the water bottle and slid a straw into it. "Drink." He commanded in a soft voice. As I drank, I realized why he had been higher in the army than the others. He was strong with words, but not demanding, and could make you want to do something. As we watched the movie, Japer repeatedly made me drink the water, and rubbed my forehead, trying to cool me off. At one point, I just lost it. I buried my face in his chest and cried.
"Oh, baby, what's wrong?" I paused the movie, wondering what was making her like this. I hadn't been paying attention to the move, more to her. "What happened, sweetheart?" I gathered her in my cold arms. "Y...you." She sobbed. "What did I do?" I immediately asked, my voice losing it's smoothness. "How did I hurt you sweetheart?" I stroked her cheek. "I..it's not that Jasper. You don't deserve someone like me. You deserve someone like Alice, someone who's good enough for you. I'm not good enough. I'm causing you pain." Her head was buried in my chest again. "Oh, sweetheart." I murmured, my voice compelling. "I love you. You're the one who captured my heart, Amanda." She shrugged. "I did not. You're just lying." She lied her head on my shoulder. "Amanda, if I didn't love you, then you wouldn't be here, I wouldn't have kissed you yesterday, and I wouldn't do this." I gently pulled her upright, and she spun dizzily. "Are you okay?" I asked immediately, imagining her stomach churning with nausea. "I'm...I'm fine." Her voice was steady enough. Slower, I pulled her to her feet, being very careful. Gently, I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her, full on the lips. She went limp.
"Amanda? Amanda!" I lied her down immediately. Did she have a cut on her lip, and I had killed her by sucking her blood? Had I bitten her and not realized it? "J-J-Ja-Jas...Jaspe...." She mumbled. "I'm right here, sweetheart. I'm right here." I lied my hand on her forehead. She still had a fever. "Jasper..." She moaned again. I lifted her head gently and let it rest in my hands. "I'm here, baby. Sleep, okay? Go to sleep, sweetheart. I love you."
In my dream, I saw Jasper. His cool hand was on my forehead, and my arms were around his neck. "Let go now Amanda." He muttered. His eyes turned red, black, and red again. His hair turned pitch black, and his smile was now a snarl. "Come closer Amanda." He chuckled, but it wasn't him. "Come closer to me, Jasper Hale." I woke up screaming.
"Amanda! Amanda!" Tears were streaming down her face. "No! Jasper!" She tried to escape my grip. I let go immediatly, thinking she was going to throw up. But she ran, ran towards Emmett. He looked very confused as she panted, "Jasper... thirsty... change..." He shrugged. "Jasper! Please come calm her down!" I walked over slowly. "Amanda?" She looked like she was hiding from me. "Amanda, it's Jasper. It's okay, I'm here." I started calming her body down, and she relaxed, trying to get back to me. "Jasper." She burst into tears in my arms.
"Sweetheart, sweetheart, calm down." I whispered. "Tell me what happened, baby." We were on the couch now, and she was crying like mad. All I could hear was my name. "Shh, shh. Calm down Amanda. Tell me what's going on, baby." She rolled over and looked me in the eye, then leaned forward and kissed me on the lips. Surprised, but pleased, I went with it, gently lifting her into a more comfortable position. She broke the kiss after a few minutes and stared at me. One tear escaped the corner of her eye, and I wiped it away quickly with quick fingers. "What happened sweetheart?" I asked again. "B-bad dream." She shuddered. "You... you... you tried to kill me." I rubbed her shoulder. "Amanda, I could do that at any time. You know that." She didn't seem to want to say any more, so I let her wrap her arms around my body and snuggle back to sleep.
"Jasper, I need to check her while she's asleep." He gently unwound her hands from his neck and kissed her forehead, then moved out of the way. After waiting ten minutes for the effects of Jasper's cool skin to wear off, I stuck a thermometer in her mouth. "It's going down slowly." I noted. Jasper smiled slightly. "That's good." Amanda turned over towards Jasper's voice; I chuckled. "What?" Jasper asked. "She recognizes you, even in her sleep."
After Carlisle was done with his tests, I pulled Amanda back on my lap. This time, she did not awake for four hours. I stroked her hair and wondered if she would stay here long. If so, how would I hunt?
"Jasper?" My throat burned. "Yes, sweetheart?" He looked at me with concerned eyes, his eyebrows sliding together. "Ugh. I feel terrible." He rubbed my forehead. "I bet so. Do you want anything?" He sounded exactly like a preschool teacher. "Jasper, please stop talking to me like I'm four. I'm not that crazy." I giggled, but stopped; it hurt my throat. "Sure." He grinned. "Whatever you want, ma'am." He tipped an invisible hat and I smiled. "I'm going to get you more water. You're running out." He remarked, and left. "And so I'm left here on the couch."
"Here you go." I smiled and put the straw in the cup. "Drink." I lifted the glass to her mouth, my other arm around her shoulders. She shivered as the ice cold water hit her throat. "Are you cold?" I immediatly retracted my arm. "N-n-no." She shivered, but I knew better. I moved to the other side of the room, not willing to ge ther any sicker. "Jasper..." She moaned. "Please. How could I get sicker?" I knew many ways. "Trust me, Amanda, and don't let me near you." She started to stand up, and I immediatly appeared beside her, taking her hand. "See? You can't stay away." She laughed. "Whatever." I chuckled, and pulled her close to my body.
I pulled her lips closer to mine, craving the absolute nothingness but her warm lips, pressed against mine. She seemed willing at first, but flinched away. "What?" I asked. She must be really sick. She never declined a kiss. "Now I know you're sick Amanda. You never decline a kiss." She coughed. "You need to hunt." She choked out. "Okay sweetheart. I'll go find Emmett." I kissed her forehead and went to find Emmett.
"Em?" I knocked on the door. "Coming Jazz!" He grinned and opened the door. "Yes, I'll go hunting." He laughed. We got ready to leave.
"Amanda, I'm going to go hunting, 'kay?" I kissed her forehead lightly. "I'll be back in an hour, I promise." Her hand clasped at mine, then let go. "Bye, sweetheart."
We walked outside quickly, and Jasper seemed to be..shivering? "Dude, are you cold?" He shook his head. "No." He replied curtly. And then he did something that was not vampirely possible.
He sneezed.
"Jazz?" I shook his body. "Jazz? You okay?" I shook him again. "No..." He gazed off. "I'm going back to Amanda." He muttered, and walked inside.
"You're done hunting?" I asked. It had been about five minutes. "Why are your eyes still black?" I asked. "I'm not hunting." I lied down beside her. "Japer, if this is about me being sick, I was the one who told you to go. I can take care of myself in an hour." I could, but I'd rather have him there. "It's partially about that." He agreed. "But mostly because I should be in vampire quarintine." I gasped and immediatly wrapped my arms around him. "What happened Jazzy? Why? Are you okay?" He took my hand. "Calm down Amanda. What happened was I caught what you got." I nearly passed out.
"Oh no...Jasper, this is all my fault. I should have never kissed you..." I rambled on about how bad I was. He rubbed my forehead. "It's not your fault, baby. Besides, now I can do this and not worry." And Jasper began to kiss me wiht an unknown passion.
"Sweetie?" He pulled my head to his shoulder. "Yes?" I asked, snuggling closer to him. "Can... um...well, I didn't get to hunt..." I understood. I immediatly stood up, letting him have the couch.
"No, no. You lie down." I lifted her onto the couch and kissed her forehead. "Overprotective southern gentleman." She giggled. I laughed along, feeling lighter. "Wait...Jazz, don't you want to lie down?" She made to get off the couch and let me have it again, but I pushed her back down. "Stay there baby. You're sicker than I am, and, besides, I'm a vampire." I grinned. I actually was pretty tired for some reason, but I wouldn't let her know that. "I'm going to raid Carlisle's stores of blood." I muttered. She became alert immediatly. "No human blood." She tried to order. "Don't worry." I kissed her forehead again and pushed her back down to the couch. "I'll get Carlisle to get it."
After I had been given enough blood that my eyes were light gold, and I had made sure I was in control enough to see Amanda, I hurried downstairs. She looked horrible.
"Sweetheart!" I rushed downstairs to help her. "Oh, baby. What happened?" Her head resting camly on my shoulder as she hyperventilated. "J...J...Jasper." She coughed out. "What happened sweetheart?" My voice coaxed. "V...V...Victoria." I took her hand immediatly. "Sweetie, I think you were hallucinating. She's dead." Amanda shook her head. "Jasper." She whispered. Her head drooped and fell into my lap, and I lifted it gently, resting her head on my knee. As I stroked Amanda's hair, I pondered if Edward really had killed Victoria.
In my dream, Jasper was sick, sicker than I was. He lied on the couch as I tried to tend to him, ut Victoria held me back. "No, no, Amanda, he'll get better." She was saying. I fought to get to Jasper as he started coughing. "No, no. He'll be fine." I started coughing. Jasper made a move to get to me. I tried to tell him to stop, but I couldn't speak. He walked over and hugged me... then disappeared.
"No! Jasper!" I moaned. "Baby, I'm right here, I'm right here." Suddenly, Jasper was holding me in his amrs, soothing my shaking body. "I'm here baby. I'm here. You're fine." He coaxed. "Jasper." My arms constricted around his neck. "Shhh, shhh." He mused, then lightly touched my lips with a long finger. "Shhh. It's going to be okay." Jasper leaned down to press his lips to my cheek, and then gently to my lips.
I started coughing again, and he let go. "Amanda?" I swayed. His hands steadied my waist. "Jasper." I whispered. He took my hand and helped me sit down. Jasper's hands smoothed down my hair, trying to calm me. "It's okay baby. It's going to be okay." He looked at my face. "Oh."
Uttering a cough of my own, I helped her to the bathroom. She leaned over, and, for her sake, I closed my eyes. I kept her hair away from her face and my hand was on her forehead. "Are you okay?" I asked, my eyes still closed. "F...for now." She stuttered. I helped her rinse her mouth out, then lie back down. Amanda lied down next to me on the couch, and I pulled her closer, my arms around her feverish body.
I coughed once, and Amanda looked at me in terror. She wriggled out of my grasp and stood up. "Jasper, you're sick too. You need to rest." I rolled my eyes. "Sweetie..." I mumbled, but she wasn't listening. "Stay." Her hoarse voice commanded. She walked slowly into the kitchen, wobbling slightly. I sighed and followed her.
"Jasper..." Amanda rolled her eyes at me. I took her waist, steading her shaking body. "You're the one who needs to rest." I muttered. I took one hand off her waist and starting making hot chocolate. "Drink." I commanded when she was back on the couch. I helped her upright and she drank, a little color coming into her face. "Stay." I kissed her forehead, and went to get Carlisle.
"I'm fine." I muttered, but Jasper was gone. A few minutes later, he came back in, followed by Carlisle. With a light cough, he sat down, lying his hand on my forehead. "Please, Jasper, lie down." I complained. I couldn't bear ot see him like this, sick and weak. "I'm fine sweetheart." Jasper argued, but he let it go. I tried to get up, let him lie down and rest, but his hands were too strong. "No, Amanda. I'm fine. Can we please stop arguing about this?" I nodded. "Please."
I actually did not feel well at all, but I would never tell her that. Selfishly, I did want her off the couch and better, so I could lie down. My throat was burning more than usual, and I felt... tired, somehow. My nose was stuffy, and I did not feel normal. I decided to let Amanda have her way for once, and I lied down next to her. She buried her head in my chest, and I wrapped my amrs around her. Amanda was unusually cold. "Baby, are you alright?" She shivered in response. I let go of her shaking body and grabed a blanket from the side of the couch. Gently, I incased her in the warmth, and her shivering slowed. "J-J-Jasper." She stuttered, and moved closer. "Amanda, you'll freeze." I protested. "I don't care." And she lied her head on my shoulder. Stupidly, I let her, and sighed. I was to easy to persuade when it came to Amanda. She was no good for me. Neither of us seemed to care, though, as she fell asleep, whispering my name right before her eyes closed.
"Jasper." She murmured an hour later. I rubbed her back. "I'm here." I leaned down to her neck. "I'm right here sweetheart." She wrapped her arms around my neck and I sighed. I was so... predictable, I thought, as I wrapped Amanda in my arms. She smiled happily in her sleep. I coughed and pulled her slightly closer, her shivering body a bad omen to me. I needed her close, needed her here. If she died from the Spanish Influenza... I wouldn't be able to live with myself.
"Jasper?" I shook his shoulder gently. "Yes?" He sat up, one hand still on Amanda's forehead. "I... well... I think you need to go outside for a bit." He looked very confused. "Why?" His voice was cracking from the flu. "I'm getting a blood sample." I muttered quietly. "Oh."
He walked outside, his eyes nearly red. I wondered if it was from the flu, or if he had been crying. I would have thought the flu, as vampires couldn't cry, but we couldn't get sick either. Hmm.
Slowly, I took the needle out of my bag. While she was still sleeping, I gently put it into her arm. She coughed slightly but did not awaken. I got the blood I needed, and stuck a band-aid over the wound. Jasper wouldn't be able to come in here for hours.
Amanda began to cough in her sleep. this didn't look like what usually happened to her. I leaned over her, ready to help if needed. And then she began to cough up blood.
"Esme! Get everyone out of the house!" I called, hoping she would hear me. I heard the distint "thump" of Emmett jumping out the window, the clatter of Rosalie's heels on the pavement, the sounds of Bella, Edward, and Renesmee sliding out theirs. Esme came down, then immediatly walked outside. I'll get Jasper restrained." She murmured. He was going to be misrable.
I could see the look on Jasper's face. He was in pure agony, smelling the blood and wanting to get to Amanda. "Emmett!" Esme called quickly. I grabbed Jasper's wrists, not letting him get any further. "Bella!" She came up and stood in front of Jasper. "Calm down Jazz." She whispered. "She's fine. It's nothing." And then Amanda screamed.
"Emmett, let GO!" I protested, trying to get to my screaming soulmate. "No, Jasper! She's bleeding!" That stopped me dead in my tracks. I wasn't going to kill her. I calmed slightly, but stills truggled to help her. "No."
"Amanda?" She was awake now, and her shirt was soaked. "Carlisle." She sputtered. "It's okay Amanda. Listen. I'm going to bring Bella in here, because I know she can handle this. She's going to help you get dressed, and then you are to stay here, okay? You can not go outside to Jasper, do you understand?" She nodded. "Good. I'll get Bella."
"Jasper?" Carlisle walked out, a sad smile on his face. "What happened?" I asked immediatly, stiffening up. "I took the sample. The bad news is... you're going to have to stay away from her for at least four hours, maybe more. I stared at Carlisle, not comprehending him. "But... it doesn't that long for something to scab over... not even something that small." He looked at me, a sympathetic look on his face. "She started coughing up blood."
I started hyperventilating, and Emmett gripped my wrists tighter. I wanted to get to her, to help her, to make sure she was okay... but there was blood. And where there was blood, there was trouble.
"Bella." Carlisle whispered. "Amanda needs your help. She's covered in blood, literally drenched in it, and she needs new clothes. I know you can handle this." Bella looked terrified, and I did what only I could do. I calmed her down, letting her sink into a world where nothing was wrong. It was all I could do to help Amanda.
"Come on, Bella." she caem with me, walking into the house. "Oh!" She cried, seeing Amanda. "You see the problem. I know you can do this Bella. Please." I could tell she wasn't breathing, but she was okay. She wasn't going to kill Amanda.
"Come on Amanda." Bella helped me stand up and walk upstairs. "I'm going to run to the cottage and get something, okay? I'd take you, but..." I understood. "Jasper?" She nodded. "Stay here."
Fifteen seconds later, she was back, holding a long purple and white nightgown in her hands. "You're about my size, so these sould fit." She muttered, helping me pull off my blood stained shirt and pants. I lifted the nightgown on over my head. It felt better to be in clothes that were not covered in my blood.
"Come downstairs." We walked slowly, making sure I was steady enough, and I lied down. I was tired, and jsut wanting to sleep. "Jasper..." I murmured. "He can't come in, Amanda. There's to much blood." Bella whispered. I knew that, but I wanted him anyway. "Can I go out there?" I mumbled. Carlisle hesitated, then nodded. "If you're careful."
Amanda walked out, steadied by Bella. Her face was pale white, nearly vampiric, and her lips were white. She looked weak, and very, very tired. But she was alive.
She wobbled towards me, her body shaking in the cool night air. Her arms constricted around me. "Are you ok, sweetheart? I heard it was bloo- bad." I stopped myself from saying bloody. "I- I'm just tired." She sighed, leaning against me for support. I let one hand drop to her waist, and the wobbling slowed. "I'm sorry I couldn't be there sweetheart." I whispered, really feeling sorry for her. "Don't worry Jasper; I understnad." Amanda smiled. "Thanks."

by **shadowsowner888** 11/22/2009, 10:01 am

Oooh. :3 OMG. You are so amazing - you made me have that hormone rush/heart flutter/warm fuzzy/whatever it is that I get when I see really really sweet romance. x3 And it was a really strong one, too!! Even stronger than I felt during New Moon! And that was just after the first paragraph.

You did an amazing job. Very Happy

I mean, it's like, sure they shouldn't really have been able to get sick . . . but it's really creative. I like it.

Most of your sentences are starting with a pronoun, though, I noticed. :3 If you tried and did them a different way, that could make everything flow better, ya know? Like this paragraph:

I walked into the room. "Amanda." Jasper took my face in his hands. I smiled slightly. He brought me to the center of the room, his eyes sparkling with delight. He wrapped my arms around his neck, and his amrs constricted around my body, pushing me closer to him. His gentle face leaned closer to my plain one, his lips approaching. Gently, he pressed them simply to mine, the ice cold of his lips soothing. He kissed me lightly, gently, but passionatly, with true love.

Could become this:

I walked into the room. "Amanda," Jasper said, taking my face in his hands. I smiled slightly. Bringing me to the center of the room, the vampire's eyes started sparkling with delight, and the next thing I knew, he'd wrapped his arms around my neck. They constricted around my body, pulling me closer. His gentle face leaned closer to my plain one, and gently, he pressed his lips to mine to mine. The ice cold of them was soothing. Jasper kissed me lightly, gently, but passionately, with true love.

Overall I enjoyed it, though . . . is this going to be a part of Correction? Smile

by *Strongly*[Emo]tional 11/22/2009, 11:53 am

Omg you did a really great job! I loved reading it. You could denfenitly write a new Twilight Saga!
You did a really amazing job and I can't wait for you to write more I sure hope you do.

by **Jesus4Eternity** 11/22/2009, 1:36 pm

Shad:

That is a very good point. xD, I'll work on that.

And yes, this should be in Correction later....after it's all edited. xD

by **shadowsowner888** 11/22/2009, 3:14 pm

:3 Yay!!

Haha, now I know what's gonna happen . . . xD So sad. But I can't wait to read it in the actual story!

by **Jesus4Eternity** 11/22/2009, 3:16 pm

Psh, you knew Edward was a vampire in twilight from reading the back. xD

by **shadowsowner888** 11/22/2009, 3:41 pm

I know.

And it ruined the whole story. *sigh*

*isteasing*

by **Jesus4Eternity** 11/22/2009, 3:58 pm

DWAI.

'Sides, you're getting insider info anyway...I post random Correction parts on the Twilight RP, and you see vaugly what's gonna happen. xD

by **shadowsowner888** 11/23/2009, 8:26 pm

Lol, yeah. xD I do enjoy the stuff I read, but all the same, I still really don't like spoilers.

by Crystal Aura 12/8/2009, 9:10 pm

I love the Twilight series. You guys are mind-boggling. That Meyer woman is a genius. What else is there to say? worshippy

by **Malicious Nightmares** 12/8/2009, 9:18 pm

XD Meyer Woman. XD

Lol, Izzie. X3

She says "Meyer Woman", too much. smug

[I said nothing. XD]

Anyways, lovely, Amanda! :1 [Beastboy! XD]

by **Jesus4Eternity** 12/8/2009, 9:41 pm

Gracias, mi amiga!

Yo hablo ingles y espanol.

xD

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Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness

Re: Random Twilightness