[FEAT] Virtually Real ~~/~~ Glossary, chapter 2, chapter 3 (partial) up

Maturity: There'll probably be some violence, most likely no romance, but you never know. I have pretty much no idea where this is going, soo... Oh, and maybe a bit of minor swearing that'll hopefully be censored out.
Fantasy: Well, half of it is in a virtual reality, and the other half is in the future and possibly on another planet.

Okay, so, this is (hopefully) my main TwigWriSum project, and I have no idea where it's going, and the prologue isn't even done yet, and it's completely unedited, but... yeah, I felt like putting it up. xD

And if there's some extra words in there, tell me, please. I sometimes don't delete words I replace when I'm trying to boost my word count. xD

Glossary:
academy - school
the Arcade - the place to go for VR and any other, older video game you may want to play; usually several on each Floor, although they're spread out and each region usually centers around one specific Arcade
carto - map
comm - communicator
conveyor - transporter; uses a lot of power
crael - a completely harmless rat-like creature in VR
the Deadlands - a perfectly circular area of dry, cracked ground and rock outcroppings, about three kannai in diameter; none of the players know what it's for, and the makers aren't telling
energy boosters - can only be gained by sedating a creature long enough to touch it while it's still alive; boosts your VR power percentage by a set amount depending on the creature; remains dormant in player's beltpouch until activated
Everlasting StikGum - chewing gum that never runs out of flavor but that is impossible to get off anything it sticks to; perfect for pranks and the main reason why no one ever sits in public places
gael - a small, gray, lizard-like creature in VR with near perfect camouflage, excellent reflexes, venomous teeth, and a preference for human flesh
the Gray Forest - a mildly dangerous section of forest on one side of the Deadlines; borders both the White Forest and the Black Forest
kannai - a unit of distance measurements; about equivalent to a quarter mile
reality - the real world; consists of a complex of twenty-six floors numbered from the bottom up
pocketball - a metal sphere, small enough to be pocketed, but that can hold quite a lot of stuff
pod - the most common form of transportation in reality; a spherical capsule that's slid along rails until it's launched out over the city and touches down safely wherever the driver desires
shuttlepod - the pod equivalent of an early-millenium bus
sim - short of simulation; a type of video projection typically used for education on faraway, rare, or extinct plants and animals
tender - doctor (not the meat kind of tender; tender as in someone who tends to others)
videophone projection - like an early-millenium webcam, except rather than viewing the face on a screen, the person is projected in a three-dimensional hologram in front of the user
VR - virtual-reality; a popular game; only allowed for people thirteen years and older
VR capsule - a small, cylindrical chamber that takes players to VR
VR name - a unique name that you choose for yourself and use for anything relating to VR; commonly starts with the same letter as the given name although it's not required
zael - a seven-foot, blue-skinned, lumpy humanoid creature; slow-moving but dangerous

Prologue
I stood in a field surrounded by woods. Early wildflowers peeked up through the gently swaying grass, brightly colored spots of life among the browning weeds. New green leaves rustled softly on the branches overhead. The two suns sent rays of orange and red light down into the clearing. Birds called for their mates, and a crael scuttled by my toes, chittering madly like they always do.
My commpiece buzzed and I accepted the call. “Sev, where are you?” Sev was only my VR - virtual-reality - name, not my given, which was Simóne, but everybody called me that anyway. “The zaels are closing in. I need your help.”
“Calm down, Pake,” I said, picturing the hungry but slow-moving beasts in my mind. “You have plenty of time.”
“Don’t be so sure,” he replied, sounding nervous. “I’m uploading my location to your carto now.”
I pulled up my map, the holographic projection of the surrounding terrain hovering just over the palm of my hand. It was only two dimensions at the moment, but they said the maps should be upgraded to 3-D any day now. They’d been saying that for six months.
A flashing red light in the center of the chart marked my position on the map. As I watched, the projection flickered for a second and a pulsing blue dot appeared, only a few inches away from mine. I checked the scale; he was about six kannai away, roughly a mile and a half in old Earth measurements. I allowed myself to utter a few choice curse words under my breath: Zaels were slow, but not that slow. I’d have to us my conveyor. I hated to do it, as it drained my energy levels like nothing else, and I’d have to turn off all my other devices before using it or I’d be completely out of power.
I curled my hand into a loose fist, switching off my map, said “See you in a sec” to Pake, and powered down my comm. It made me feel both blind and deaf at the same time, though for the moment, at least, I was nothing of the sort. I checked my power guage: 87%. It would take 80% to get myself five kannai; I’d have to sprint the last quarter mile. I could do that.
I set my coordinates and jumped as high as I could, and the grass vanished beneath my feet. I landed on different ground. It was bare, dusty, and cracked. I stumbled a bit from the impact, and then looked around before breaking into a run.
From a distance, I could see Pake backed against a bare rock outcropping, a drove of lumbering zael surrounding him in a semicircle. The huge, bluish-skinned creatures shuffled towards my friend, long blades swinging. I ran faster, but I knew I wasn’t going to make it. I stopped and looked away as they reached him, but I could still hear him shout as he went down.
And then two words scrolled across my line of vision, the words I always dreaded seeing:
Game over.

[Censored swearing in this chapter.]

Chapter 1
The world flashed black for a moment, and then I was back in the Arcade, in the VR capsule. There was a swishing noise as the chamber unlocked and the door slid open. I stepped out, seething, hearing the beeps as my score dropped by a few hundred points.
“Sorry,” Pake - or Pierre, as he was called here - said, sounding sheepish as he emerged from his own capsule. “They just showed up and I couldn’t get away.”
I sighed. I was one of the top ranked players in the district, and I could pretty much have my choice of any partner I wanted, but I chose to play with Pake, who, frankly, was not the greatest player. I only did it because he was my best friend, and if he tried to go solo he’d probably waste all his money trying to get through the first level.
“Why were you in the Deadlands, anyway?” I asked. “I thought I told you to meet me in the Gray Forest.”
“It was supposed to be a short cut,” he explained. “My map hasn’t been upgraded yet. It doesn’t show anything living but you and me. I didn’t know they were there.”
“Pierre!” a voice yelled from outside. It was Sidney, Pake’s older sister, who he’d told to wait outside with the pod he wasn’t old enough to drive while we just took a minute to check our scores. She didn’t sound happy. Pake grumbled something unintelligably under his breath.
“Need a ride?” he added after a second.
“No, I’ll steal a pod and drive it myself,” I said sarcastically. “Yes, of course I want a ride. If Sid’s not too mad. It might be safer to hitchhike.”
“Fair point,” he mused thoughtfully. “You really don’t want to see her road rage.”
“Pierre!” The shrill tone to her voice made my ears hurt.
“Coming!” He turned back to me. “If you want a ride, better be quick.” He started for the door, walking quickly. I followed, not even having to see to weave my way through all the games and VR capsules. I knew the Arcade better than just about any place on Floor Six. I could hear Sidney yelling at Pake in the front seat as I slipped discreetly into the back. She didn’t have to know I was there; I could walk home from Pake’s place.
I buckled in as the engine slid silently into life and the pod began to move along the rails. I dug my fingernails into the upholstery of the seat as we tilted back, moving smoothly up a steep incline. I knew what was coming next: We would be catapulted out over Floor Six the city and take flight, then land safely wherever we wanted to go. It was kind of like one of those old-fashioned Earth rollercoasters I’d heard about. Everybody I knew loved it; they thought it was the greatest thrill on Floor Six. I hated it. It made me feel like I was about to throw up.
There was barely a jolt as we landed beside Pake’s house. I quickly slipped out of the pod.
“Simóne?” Sidney asked in surprise. “How did you get here? No, never mind, I don’t want to know. Come on, Pierre. Mom’s gonna give you HEAVEN!. I told her I’d have you home at four.”
“Aw,” he complained. “Really?” He sighed. “Well, bye, Sev. I’ll probably be grounded for the next three months. See you at academy.”
“Bye,” I said, biting my lip to hide a smile. I waved, then turned to start down the lane. I knew the path between Pake’s house and mine so well I could walk it in my sleep.
I reached my house and stepped around the pod in the drive, pressing my palm to the security pad. The door slid open and I stepped through, about to loudly announce my arrival, when I heard soft, worried voices drifting out from the living room. I froze where I was, hopefully out of sight, and strained my ears to listen.
“-worried about her,” my mother was saying worriedly. “She’s addicted to that game. It’s not healthy.”
“Relax, Ginata,” my father said soothingly. His voice had the odd, slightly tinny quality of a videophone projection; he must still be at work down on Floor One. “She’s the second best in the region, eighth in the complex. We should be proud.”
“If we’re not careful she’ll waste her life away,” Mom insisted.
“We can’t take away the thing she loves best in the world. Besides, you know why she’s so into it.”
“Don’t...”
“It’s the only place she can see.”
“It wouldn’t be if we could afford that surgery.” Mom sounded like she was close to tears. I let out an involuntary choking sound, clapping my hand over my mouth to stifle a cry of surprise. I heard her chair scrape the floor as she stood to look for the source of the noise and quickly ran for the ladder that led to my loft room. I pulled myself through the trapdoor, slammed it shut, and moved the end of the sofa over so it couldn’t be opened. I knew there had been a good reason to bring that thing up here. I groped for the wall and pulled out the shelf/ledge that doubled as my bed, curling up under the covers to sob into my pillow.
Surgery. Oh my God, the surgery. They had lied, my own parents had lied. They kept saying no, it wasn’t ready yet, it wasn’t proven, there might be side effects, the Health Department had to approve it first. But it was approved; I could have it. I could be able to see, in minutes, but we couldn’t afford it.
One of the main reasons I loved VR so much was that it gave you a new body, a virtual reality body. You still looked the same, maybe a little taller, a little more athletic, but more or less the same, from a distance. The thing about VR was that it fixed any problems you had: Scars would disappear while in the game, birth defects were fixed, senses restored to full health.
When I was very, very small - only a few days old, they told me - I’d had an accident. I don’t know what it was, I don’t know what had happened. All I know is that ever since then, I’ve been completely without sight. When I was five they began to develop a surgery that would fix my eyes, but my parents always claimed that it wasn’t ready yet, that I’d just have to wait a little longer.
When I was younger, Pierre and my parents had tried many, many times to explain what sight was like, but how can you explain light and color and vision to someone who’s never seen?
And the first time I tried VR, the first day I was allowed, the day I turned thirteen, I opened my eyes, and I saw, and I stood there for hours, just looking. I was alone there, because Pierre is a few months younger than I am and there was no one else I wanted to be with the first time. And I had been glad that I was alone, because for the first time since I was six, I had sat down right there and bawled my eyes out. And then I’d gone back to Floor Six, and I’d been blind again. My parents had taken me home and I’d gone up to my room and cried some more.
But in the two and a half years since then, I hadn’t cried once. Until now.
Because my parents had lied, and because I knew I would never get the surgery now, and because I didn’t know how I could stand going into VR again, knowing that eventually I would have to come back into the horrible darkness of the real world.

Chapter 2
I woke the next morning, the headache behind my temples throbbing in time with the irritating, high-pitched beeping of my alarm. Groggily, I groaned and felt for the snooze button. I pressed all the buttons, too tired to identify the right button by touch, and eventually the beeping stopped. I let my head fall back onto the pillow, feeling horrible but unable to recall why. After several seconds, it all came flooding back, and I rolled over onto my back, silently praying that it had just been a dream.
With a sigh, I swung my feet over the side of the bed and placed them carefully on the cold hardwood floor, levering myself into what could be called a sitting position. As I stood, I opened my eyes - and saw.
It only lasted a fraction of a second, but for a single heartbeat, there was a flash of color in my vision, and then everything was blank again. I blinked hard, trying to make it happen again, but everything remained flat and empty, the same as always.
“Maybe it was just my imagination...” I said uncertainly, out loud. Or maybe I’m going crazy. I pushed my bed/shelf back into the wall and my closet slid open. I couldn’t see it, of course, but I knew inside there were three racks: shirts, pants and skirts, and jackets. Each section was sorted by color, and within color, by shade. I had to be very exact about that, or it would be extremely difficult to pick out something to wear that didn’t look horrible. At the very end of each rack was my academy uniform. With a sigh, I pulled out the white blouse, forest green skirt, and matching sweater, then reached up to the drawers above to get underclothes and a pair of uniform knee-length white socks.
I peeled off my clothes from yesterday that I’d never changed out of and tossed them down the laundry chute. They’d be clean by the time I got home. I stepped into the bathroom and turned on the shower as hot and as powerful as it would go, standing under the heated spray and ignoring the scorched feeling of my bare skin. Finally I switched off the water and leaned against the cool ceramic tiling of the shower wall, letting myself fall into a dazed stupor in which I didn’t have to think.
I wasn’t sure how much later it was when I finally jerked back into reality, but I was already dry. I ran a comb through my tangled hair and pulled on my academy clothes, knowing I was already way late. It was my responsibility to get to academy on time, so my mother wasn’t banging on the door or anything. She probably wasn’t even paying attention to the time.
I’d definitely already missed the shuttlepod to academy, so I’d have to either beg a ride from Mom - which wasn’t likely - or walk. I pushed the couch away from the trapdoor - which was oddly difficult; for some reason I was feeling strangely weak this morning - and climbed down, grabbing my pocketball from the table by the door and slipping the little metal sphere into my blouse pocket. I stepped out the door, which had slid open for me, and into the pleasantly warm artificial sunlight of Floor Six. It never rained here. It was never cloudy, never snowing. Never too cold, never too hot. Just an eternal sunny, perfect-weathered day. Even nighttime only lasted a few hours. I knew the highest floor - though I wasn’t sure how many there were, exactly; maybe twenty-five or twenty-six? - actually had real sunlight, but even that was climate controlled. That was a big reason VR had been so wildly popular when it was first realeased - variety. And yet as much as people complained to each other, in small, private groups, it never went any farther than that. People were too scared to protest to anyone who would have any say over it. The few who had disappeared within a week, leaving no trace.
But right then, I didn’t know any of that. I knew the weather was different in VR, but I didn’t know anything else.
Only about a block away from my house, I realized something. No one was watching me. My teachers would assume I was sick and Mom thought I’d gone to school. I could wait for the shuttlepod to the Arcade. I pulled out my pocketball and shook it a bit. Underneath the banging around of my electronic textbook, I could hear the clank of several coins. At least ten, I estimated by the volume. One coin set up one round of VR for two people, or two rounds for one person, so that should be plenty to get me through the day if I played carefully enough. I changed course, a small smile tugging at the corner of my lips, heading for the shuttlepod station. I didn’t risk sitting down on the bench - Everlasting StikGum is not easy to get off cloth, or anything else, for that matter - and stood instead, my hand wrapped around the body heat-sensitive pole so the next shuttlepod would know to stop there. It was maybe five minutes or so before I heard the swish of the slim, oblong shuttlepod on the rails as it slid to a stop. I climbed in, taking a seat in the back, and deftly typed my destination into the shuttlepod’s computer. Except for one elderly man, I was the only passenger, and in those days the shuttlepod system was completely automatic.
The shuttlepod slid gently to a stop, making its signature hissing sound on the rails.
“The Arcade,” the automated voice announced. I got to my feet and left the pod, glad there hadn’t been anyone nosy on the shuttle to ask why a fifteen-year-old girl wasn’t at academy. I entered the Arcade, which was completely empty and silent, except for the beeping sounds of a kid playing hooky and using some of the really old, classic Earth games - Call of Duty and Pacman, for example - in the corner. I claimed the only single-player VR capsule at this Arcade and entered one of my coins into the slot, stepping inside the capsule and waiting for the noise of the door closing. I closed my sightless eyes and felt myself being taken into VR.
My feet hit the ground and I opened my eyes, taking in my location. I was deep in the Deadlands, where Pake had been attacked by the zaels. That was odd. Usually VR didn’t drop you where you’d been the last time you “died”. (Although, technically, I hadn’t been the one to die last time.)
A noise behind me made my hand fly to my weapon: A 20-64 stun/kill ray that you needed a special permit for in the real world but anyone could have here in VR - as long as you were good enough to find one.
When you start out in VR, you are given three things: a simple, sparsely-labeled map that only shows your location and sometimes that of your partner; a primitive [19-66] [20-22] stunning pistol; and a ten-minute holographic slideshow with a voiceover explaining all the creatures that you could encounter in VR, with a warning attached: May only be used once.
As you progressed in the game, you either found or were given better items: a more advanced map, more dangerous weapons, energy boosters, medical kits.
I spun around to face the danger, but there was nothing there. I squinted hard, knowing it was likely to be a gael: a small, intelligent creature with near perfect camouflage and excellent reflexes, not to mention its venomous teeth and a taste for human flesh. I slowly raised my gun into the air and shot a low stun ray into the sky, knowing that I might see a flurry of movement from a startled gael.
Nothing stirred. I frowned at the empty air and began to turn away...
There! I whirled and fired my weapon, still at its lowest setting, at the movement. The gael went limp, its scaly flesh quickly fading to its natural dull gray tone. I hurried forward, knowing it would only be unconscious for a few seconds. I leaned over the small creature, no bigger than my hand, that I’d heard was similar in appearance to an old Earth lizard, though of course I’d never seen a sim of one myself.
I quickly reached out to touch its slimy gray skin, smiling as a slight weight added to my beltpouch told me I’d recieved the gael energy booster, which was quite high, especially compared to the crael booster, which was only a 5% gain for the biggest and as low as .5% for the smaller juviniles.
I snatched my hand away as the gael began to stir. I took several steps back and watched it as, too dazed to camoflauge properly, it staggered towards one of the cracks in the dry ground and disappeared.
I sighed and turned away. That was too easy. I started for the Gray Forest; maybe there would be some more interesting creatures in there.
But before I’d taken two steps the ground began to shake, waves literally rolling through the dirt. Cracks appeared and spread in the dry ground, widening until they were large enough to swallow a person. Unable to keep my balance, I fell, throwing out my arms for balance. It didn’t help. My head cracked against the hard ground and I cried out, my hands scrabbling through the dust for something, anything, to hold on to. The ground continued to shake, jolting my already aching head.
And then suddenly, all was still. I forced my eyes open, only to see... nothing.
No, no, no. Was I blind in VR now, too? I felt for the ground, to push myself to my feet, only to find that I was already upright. My hand landed on a smooth metal wall, which I soon discovered curved around me in a circle. My fingers discovered a seam in the wall, which quickly widened, accompanied by a familar sound.
I was back in the Arcade. But my head still ached. That wasn’t right. Injuries weren’t tranferred from VR to reality. They were two completely separate things.
I staggered out of the capsule, hating the feeling of blindness after regaining my sight, even if I’d known it wasn’t permanent. I stumbled towards the door, moving more clumsily than I usually did, as if I couldn’t quite remember the arangement of the Arcade anymore. The jerky movements of my body that I couldn’t seem to control only made my headache worse. The pain continued to mount, but I made it all the way out the door before doubling up and throwing up the remains of last night’s dinner onto the street. One hand clapped over my mouth, I staggered over to the shuttlepod station and clasped the pole with my free hand, using it to hold me upright. After a while that seemed much longer than it was, I could hear the hiss of the shuttlepod on the rails and climbed in, slumping into a seat at the front. Luckily the pod was empty. I didn’t want any nosy people asking me what was wrong. I clumsily entered my address into the computer and then leaned back, closing my sightless eyes and trying not to think about the fact that I was in a flimsy metal sphere that was about to be launched into the air. I really didn’t need to throw up again.
The pod slid to a stop and I stumbled out, only half paying attention as I lurched up the driveway and pressed my palm to the security pad. It was far too early for me to be home from academy, but the absence of a pod in the drive meant that Mom had gone out shopping, as she often did in the afternoons. Knowing I wouldn’t be able to climb the ladder to my room in this state, I felt my way into the living room and collapsed onto the couch with a groan.
I’m not sure how long I lay there, in a kind of dazed, half-conscious state, but eventually a loud ringing shattered the silence, intensifying the ache pounding in my skull. I groaned, torn between the desire to make it stop and the heavy feeling in my limbs. Eventually I dragged myself into a position where I could reach the videophone mechanism and slammed my hand down on the buttons, not wanting to take the time to figure out which one would turn it off. I must have pressed the wrong button, because I could hear the holographic projection shimmer on in front of me. I was behind the machine, in a position that whoever it was couldn’t see me.
“Hello?”
Pake’s voice startled me into answering. “...Pake?”
“Sev! How come you weren’t at academy today?”
“Ditched,” I muttered, rubbing my head and wishing I knew how to turn down the videophone’s volume to a more bearable level.
He paused. “You don’t sound so good. You okay?”
“Hit my head,” I replied, my voice slightly slurred. “’M fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah.”
There was a long, relief-giving moment of silence. “Well... I’ll see you whenever, then, I guess.”
“Mm-hm,” I mumbled, letting my head drop back onto the couch cushions. The projection turned off and I slipped quickly back into my half-conscious state.

Chapter 3
A while passed. The pain in my head continued to mount and I threw up again once, on the carpet beside the sofa. From a great distance, I heard the front door open and footsteps in the hall. Some small, conscious part of my brain fuzzily thought, Oh, Mom’s home.
The footsteps grew faster and closer, and then I was aware of someone leaning over me. “Sev? Sev - Simóne, can you hear me?” I was surprised to hear my real name coming from Pake’s voice, though for some reason my scrambled mind didn’t find it strange that Pake was here at all. After a few seconds it occurred to me that I should respond, but I couldn’t figure out how to make my mouth work. A hand grasped my shoulder, shaking me gently. I tried to push it away, but my arms were like lead; I couldn’t move them.
I finally found the part of my mind that seemed to make my mind work. “Pake,” I mumbled.
“Hey,” he said, a small, relieved chuckle accompanying his voice. “You really had me scared there for a minute. God, you look horrible. What happened?”
“Hit my head.” Had I already told him that? I couldn’t remember.
“On what?”
“...Ground.”
His hand very lightly moved over my head - I knew he wanted to be a tender when he was older - and I flinched away as his fingers grew too close to the injury.
“Fell pretty hard, huh?”
“Mm-hm.”
“Should I call your mom?”
I shook my head, then winced. “No.”
“Hospital?”
“No.”
“Sev, you almost definitely have a concussion, and a bad one. The longer you wait to have it checked and treated the worse it’ll be.”
“So you do it.”
There was a long pause, and when he finally spoke his voice was soft and careful. “Sev... I’m not even close to being a tender yet.”
“I don’t care. I trust you.”
“Don’t,” he insisted. “You’re safer with a real tender.”
“ I don’t want a real tender,” I asserted fiercely. “It’s you or nothing.”
Pake sighed. “Fine,” he relented, his voice clearly saying that he was going to regret agreeing to this. “But you have to stay awake, all right? And you have to tell me when I’m hurting you.”
“I will,” I promised, allowing him to gently pull me upright into a sitting position.
He started by gently running his fingers over my head again. His touch was feather-light, but it still hurt when he found the injury. He carefully parted my hair, examining the bruise.
“Sev.”
“Mm,” I mumbled.
“Stay with me. Stay awake, all right?”
“’Kay,” I said, forcing my eyes open as if it might help me stay conscious despite my absence of sight.
“When were you born?”
“Huh?”
“I’m trying to make sure you can concentrate. When’s your birthdate?”
“December 16, 2049.”
“What’s my sister’s name?”
“Sidney Michel.”
“What street do you live on?”
“Mountain Court.”
“Okay. Normally I’d check to see if your eyes were tracking, but in this case...” He trailed off awkwardly. “Anyway, I’d say you probably have a grade two concussion. I’m not really sure about treatment, though... I still say you should visit a proper tender.”
“I don’t want to,” I replied stubbornly.
He sighed and sat down on the couch beside me. “Well, I’m staying with you till your mom gets home. You shouldn’t be left alone like this.”
“Okay.”
We were silent then.

It was at least a few hours later when the front door opened again and footsteps sounded in the hall. Pake got up from the couch and left the room.
“Pierre!” my mother exclaimed in surprise. “What are you doing here? Where’s Simóne?”
“In the living room... I think she has a concussion.”
“What?” She rushed into the room and hurried over to me. “Oh, honey, what happened?”
“Fell,” I slurred, feeling worse again. She rounded on Pake.
“And you didn’t take her to the tender’s?”
“She wouldn’t let me,” he said defensively. “She said she wanted me to treat her.”
“She’s hurt! She needs a tender!”
“I’m right here,” I interjected, the angry tone in my voice ruined a bit by the fact that I couldn’t make my tongue move right and the words were slurred. “And Pake is a tender. Just not a certified one.”
“I don’t care,” she snapped, grabbing my arm and pulling me to my feet. “Come on, we’re going to see a real tender.”
“Ow! Ow, ow, ow. Stop it!” I yanked my arm away, then swayed on the spot and nearly collapsed. “I... I don’t want to go to the tender. You can’t make me.” I sat down on the couch and crossed my arms stubbornly over my chest.
“Sev, please. It’s for your own good.”
“No,” I growled.
[Unfinished]

Love it! Keep writing (:

Thanks.

Oooh, Ratty, this is so cool! :3 I'm looking forward to more.

Thanks, Shadow.

Wow, this is really good! It seems like it's going to be an awesome story. I can't wait to read more!

Thanks, Lucky. I have a bunch more that I'm too lazy to add right now but I'm writing more of it so I have an excuse. xD

Okay, I added the end of the prologue.

EDIT: And Chapter 1.

Ooh my gosh, chapter one was really good. ^^

To answer your questions: No, I couldn't tell she was blind. o_O I had no clue. It's like in Warriors, how at first Jaypaw was going around a happy dandy little kit, then suddenly he's all "I hate being blind!" and we're like, "Augh what the heck?! :O"

And I just see the font for the RL chapters as Verdana, since I don't have that font installed on my computer . . . but I'm downloading it now so I can see, so I'll edit this post in a moment.

EDIT: Wow, that looks really cool. :3 I actually was expecting it to be difficult to read, but no, it's not! I think you should keep it.

Thanks, Shadow!

Yeah, that's the kind of thing I was aiming for. I just wasn't sure if I made it too obvious or not.

Kk, tanku!

This is amazingggggg. :3

Yeah, I couldn't tell that she was blind, either. I like the font that you're using, but if it was a bit smaller... well, that'd be nice.

Thanks, Ari.

I kept making it bigger, cuz I thought it was too hard to read... I'll make it a bit smaller in the next one, then.

Sorry I didn't notice the new chapter for a while...I love it!

I didn't realize she was blind, but after I found out, I went back and reread the chapter. I noticed that you obviously didn't use a lot of adjectives that would describe what a person would see, which was nice.

Thanks. Yeah, that's what I was going for. It's hard, though, cuz I keep wanting to describe what things look like. xD It's so much easier when she's in VR.

I'm in total love with this. Total love.

xD
I loved the description for VR. It sounded like a really cool place to be.

Are you going to post more sometime soon? Just wondering.

Aww. Thanks, Icey.

IKR? I wanna go there. xD

...Possibly. I'm kinda failing at working at this so I'm only like halfway through chapter two... xD

xD Niiiice.

At least I'm counting roleplays or I'd be screwed.

Me too. Though I've been bad about RPing and adding the word count to my badge.

Added chapter 2, part of chapter 3, and a glossary.

Oooooh. ^^ Great chapter and a half, Ratty.

Thanks, Ari.

Oooh! I love the new chapter and a half.

Can I guess what's going to happen next?

That was good. *-* There's something so epic and plotty about injuring your characters badly . . .