Evil, Evil king.
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rattyjol
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almightykey
Komoda
Novastare
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Evil, Evil king.
by Novastare 5/16/2010, 9:15 pm
(( This was inspired by prince john's mother in Robin Hood. M&F Medium: some dieing and blood, Low: It's fiction, but no unicorns or anything.))
I look up, a broken land,
I say a prayer, to guide your hand.
Your people suffer as you lay in gold,
Oh all the horror that will soon unfold.
When you were young, I knew you best,
You used to be different, from all the rest.
Your hand healed many, and your hand cured,
You lead the other boys, with a wooden sword.
You showed promise and a will to fly,
How could I believe that sad little lie.
I loved those good times that gave you a tan,
I loved those bad times that made you a man.
But then you changed, yes you wanted more,
You wanted the ocean, you wanted the shore.
You killed many, good ones and bad,
When I looked, I turned away sad.
What happened to your honor it just went away,
You blacken the night and you darken the day.
Oh the cries I hear from the town,
You don't cry, you don't even frown.
You simply laugh and take what they have,
You take their lamb and you take their calf.
You give them nothing, you are a king,
Oh honor, such a forgotten thing.
And so, my son, let all of them die,
They once believed, in your little lie.
Now they don't, now they run and hide,
Your driven by anger,and your driven by pride.
So rule my son, rule until they come,
They think you stupid, they think you dumb.
I'm forced to take your side, because of my blood,
I'll be thrown to the dogs, I'll be thrown in their mud.
So sound bells, yes let them ring!
My son you're an evil, evil king.
I look up, a broken land,
I say a prayer, to guide your hand.
Your people suffer as you lay in gold,
Oh all the horror that will soon unfold.
When you were young, I knew you best,
You used to be different, from all the rest.
Your hand healed many, and your hand cured,
You lead the other boys, with a wooden sword.
You showed promise and a will to fly,
How could I believe that sad little lie.
I loved those good times that gave you a tan,
I loved those bad times that made you a man.
But then you changed, yes you wanted more,
You wanted the ocean, you wanted the shore.
You killed many, good ones and bad,
When I looked, I turned away sad.
What happened to your honor it just went away,
You blacken the night and you darken the day.
Oh the cries I hear from the town,
You don't cry, you don't even frown.
You simply laugh and take what they have,
You take their lamb and you take their calf.
You give them nothing, you are a king,
Oh honor, such a forgotten thing.
And so, my son, let all of them die,
They once believed, in your little lie.
Now they don't, now they run and hide,
Your driven by anger,and your driven by pride.
So rule my son, rule until they come,
They think you stupid, they think you dumb.
I'm forced to take your side, because of my blood,
I'll be thrown to the dogs, I'll be thrown in their mud.
So sound bells, yes let them ring!
My son you're an evil, evil king.
Last edited by Novastare on 5/17/2010, 1:54 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by Komoda 5/16/2010, 9:20 pm
*-* Absolutely wonderful! I just love how you indirectly describe things. It's hard to explain, but it really gives it that poetic feel, you know? Of course it should have a poetic feel and all (seeing how it's a poem) but still. Great job!
I really liked that part. ^^^
I loved those good times that gave you a tan,
I loved those bad times that made you a man.
But then you changed, yes you wanted more,
You wanted the ocean, you wanted the shore.
I really liked that part. ^^^
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by Novastare 5/16/2010, 9:24 pm
Thanks so much, this really helps me to improve. Also because its coming from a great poet like you! Thanks so much! 
And those lines are one of the better ones I had in my head. Some of them came to me, but the first one I knew I was going to put in there when I started.
And those lines are one of the better ones I had in my head. Some of them came to me, but the first one I knew I was going to put in there when I started.
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by rattyjol 5/16/2010, 9:59 pm
I love it! 
I really liked the part that Mo quoted, especially. 
I really liked the part that Mo quoted, especially. 
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by Novastare 5/17/2010, 1:38 pm
*cough* The movie was awesome! I mean, what? Off topic!! Sorry, 
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by DiscardedHarmony 5/17/2010, 4:41 pm
I wanna see the movie! D: It looks fabulous.
Anyways, I lurves the poem, like most of your work. It's not too prose-ish, if that makes sense. And the rhyme was not even noticeable until a few lines in. xD
Anyways, I lurves the poem, like most of your work. It's not too prose-ish, if that makes sense. And the rhyme was not even noticeable until a few lines in. xD
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by Novastare 5/17/2010, 6:08 pm
Aww, thank you Em! Thanks Bryn!!! Thanks you Hyro!! That makes me very happy.
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Re: Evil, Evil king.
by Novastare 5/17/2010, 6:13 pm
Sorry Harmony, didn't see your post for a moment. The movie was great!!! Thank you so much, I also love comments that can tell me what worked or didn't work in the poem. I'll try and make more, thank you!!
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