Nameless poem.
+5
DiscardedHarmony
xSophiexx16
rattyjol
LuckyPenny666
Mouse
9 posters
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Nameless poem.
Maturity: none really
You are an artist,
paintbrush in hand,
you color my world,
through good times and bad.
You are a surgeon,
for when I was torn,
you sewed me back up.
You are a listener,
straight-faced with care
You are my mentor;
I look up to you
You painted my world,
in bright, happy orange,
with smiles and kisses and friendship untorn
But soon I realized,
the friendship was forsworn,
for you,
the artist,
changed
You painted in grays,
changing my blue skies to dark clouds of doom,
never ceasing to loom right over my head,
casting shadows on who I thought you where,
challenging me to find who I am.
But then,
When I finally who I was,
I didn't really like myself anymore.
Because part of me,
is you.
You are an artist,
paintbrush in hand,
you color my world,
through good times and bad.
You are a surgeon,
for when I was torn,
you sewed me back up.
You are a listener,
straight-faced with care
You are my mentor;
I look up to you
You painted my world,
in bright, happy orange,
with smiles and kisses and friendship untorn
But soon I realized,
the friendship was forsworn,
for you,
the artist,
changed
You painted in grays,
changing my blue skies to dark clouds of doom,
never ceasing to loom right over my head,
casting shadows on who I thought you where,
challenging me to find who I am.
But then,
When I finally who I was,
I didn't really like myself anymore.
Because part of me,
is you.
Last edited by Lunar Demon on 12/8/2009, 8:40 am; edited 1 time in total
Mouse- Short Short Maker
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Posts : 206
Join date : 2009-06-18
Age : 26
Re: Nameless poem.
This is a really good poem! You used a really creative metaphor for it. I also really like the last line.
LuckyPenny666- Novella Composer
- Posts : 1084
Join date : 2009-08-15
Age : 628
Re: Nameless poem.
Awesome.
rattyjol- Best-Selling Author
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My DragCave Scroll!
Posts : 15981
Join date : 2009-06-08
Age : 28
Re: Nameless poem.
Thanks guys! I'm not done with it yet though.
Mouse- Short Short Maker
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Posts : 206
Join date : 2009-06-18
Age : 26
Re: Nameless poem.
totally cool! Great job!
wolflover96- Short Story Writer
- Posts : 408
Join date : 2009-12-05
Age : 28
Re: Nameless poem.
Awesome job, Mousey! I love it!
Komoda- Best-Selling Author
- Posts : 6275
Join date : 2009-07-13
Re: Nameless poem.
Ooh, it's even better now ^_^ I like the addition of the last few lines, they seem to complete it more
Re: Nameless poem.
I appreciate your kind comments!
Mouse- Short Short Maker
-
Posts : 206
Join date : 2009-06-18
Age : 26
Re: Nameless poem.
Sensational!
You're awesome at this, Lunar Demon.
You're awesome at this, Lunar Demon.
Crystal Aura- Novel Creator
- Posts : 2947
Join date : 2009-12-08
Age : 26
Re: Nameless poem.
Did I not comment on this?
I know I saw the thread before . . .
Well, I like it! :3 Hehe, somewhat relates to me . . . just somewhat . . .
I know I saw the thread before . . .
Well, I like it! :3 Hehe, somewhat relates to me . . . just somewhat . . .
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